I must begin my story with the end...Mom sitting on toilet singing "That Silver Haired Daddy of Mine"...That's to be sure no one is alarmed with the following...
I get a call from the "Cruise Ship"..Grand Pearle Assisted Living...Mom is having somewhat of a spell...She has passed out cold and scared everyone to death...Angie said, "we have called an ambulance and they should be here any minute...She was fine, sitting on the toilet, and then she was out, just out cold....Very pale, clamy, pasty looking and just out." Of course, I'll be there, soon as I can get there, but in the meantime, Angie, you do know Mom has spells and does this about every 3 months...I am not too terribly alarmed because she has done this on several occasions, the ambulance gets there, she's coming too and blood pressure is great, blood gases, sugar oxygen,,,,everything the envy of anyone involved in her medical care could possibly want...when she comes too she's a wonder, singing hymns and wondering what all the hoop la is.......I'm driving fast to get there, Angie calls,,,ambulance drivers knew Mom, her history and are taking care of her...about to decide that she is fine and are not going to transport...But since I am so close, go ahead and stop and pick up a Fleet enema for her as she has had a problem with constipation and Angie feels like there may be a little obstruction...She has gloved up and is helping her pass a stool...Pick up KY Jelly also for lubrication...OK....I am close to Walgreens....on the way I pass Fred's Dollar Store which has a big pharmacy..it is 8:57...Walgreen's closes at 9:00...Do I want to go all the way to WalMart or stop here...The parking lot is empty but I have 3 minutes...I run in the door, tell the little girl in the front, "I know you are trying to close, I know exactly what I need...I'll hurry.." No problem....I'm in the back of the store..looking, looking , looking...No KY Jelly...A tall thin man with a badge appears at the end of the aisle...Mam, we are closing, can I help you?
Yes, yes..I am hurrying....I must have KY Jelly, I can't find it...I've looked everywhere...He backed up and the look on his face was eeeww...I must have KY Jelly...immediately I know what he is thinking...That commercial with the man and woman in the bed with fireworks going off behind them..It's a sexual thing....I said, oh, this is not for me...it's for my Mother...this time when he backed up he did say uuuuhhhh....look of horror on his face...I said oh, My mom is at Grand Pearle, has a bowel obstruction and needs this...He still looked like a deer in the headlights...afterall, he is not a pharmacist, he is a night manager and doesn't really know about all this..I settled for Vaseline, Fleet Enemas, Mineral Oil. and suppositories...
The little girl who checked me out also had a look of fright on her face as I checked out and tried to explain..
You almost had to be there...
I get to the ship, Mom is on the toilet...Angie and another nurse are dealing with Mom..She looks up and says "Oh hey darling, I am so glad to see you...What fun...Are you staying for the party?"
As I said, you had to be there, I am back home now....Mom is safe and sound asleep...Angie and the staff are all so attentive and love and care for Mom....I can't help but wonder what Mr. Lamb, the guy who was waiting on me must think....
A 63 yr. old woman in the store demanding KY Jelly at closing time. I can only imagine what he was thinking....
2 comments:
glad everything is ok. I can't tell you how much your stories bring back memories of caring for my Mother. Late-night trips to Poplar Estates, the ER, cleaning up messes (of ALL kinds)...it helps me to look back with a smile..and a tear.
Happy Elise is okay!
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